10th week Term 4

Yeah... I survived. Many times I was not feeling well this term sepecially coming towards the end of the term. Many times I contemplated to see the doctor so that I can have proper rest. But I managed to pull through. I made it this term with 0 MC. But it has been a very tiring term. Most of the days, school ended late. I will always try to finish my work in school so that I dont hv to carry so many things home. Can you imagine, taking the bus with so many bags in hand. And I walk all the way down from school to BP Plaza to take the bus. Aniwaes sometimes or most of the time work that was brought home end up being brought back to school the next day untouched. I always feel mentally tired at the end of the day. What more it has always bn on my shoulder to make sure that there's dinner for all at home. So by the time I get dinner ready and eat, I practically hv no more energy to do any other things. I hope to clear more work especially during the Sept break.

Tough

Every Thursday is a 'heavy' day for me. 5 periods with 3E4 & 3E5. 10 periods in a stretch with half hour break in between. So busy with finalizing on their coursework so that can do practical exam. So had to push them. Some students literally had to be pushed. Talking to some of them is really like talking to the wall. No response. I had to ask slowy..DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE WORDS THATS COMING OUT OF MY MOUTH. Real challenge you know taking this class. Cant get all of them in class cos some absent, some in blue rm and some in green room. Funny. This class surely got something happening. All the school need is the red room. Then those who need to blow up can go there to explode like some one I know. Then she wont explode at us. I think she will be the one to use the room most. Seriously, cant understand why she jumps and just flare up. Without even finding out what was the actual story. Really pizzing ple. Then the way she talk to you like as though you owe her money. Simply demanding for things to be done this way...No wrong.. Her way.Aniwaes have to come back on Sat for practical exam for 1 class. then next week another class. Really hectic. This weekend will be a busy weekend. Busy with kenduri. Why suddenly so many kenduri.. not sure. Thank God today Kenneth came back from MC. He had bn away for 5 days. Must be so sick. I had to handle the 4N prelims. That was ok. But it the other ple that i cant tahan. The whole week shes been pms-ing. More like menopausing. Wonder when it will end. Tomorrow another busy day. Morning school. Afternoon need to go Woodlands Lib for Arts Exhibition. Evening having the parent talk. Where can I slot the time to collect my gown. Im supposed to be excited abt this but Im not. Yeah excited a bit but some how not like wt I expect it to be. Someone said that the excitement of going thro it and looking to geeting it is more than when you actually know that it yours already. Just surprised that Im feeling this way cos after all I work hard for this. Aniwaes, it'll be a long day.
Oh yes.
My girl turning 15 tomorrow. To my dear daughter, Mama wish you a happy happy day. My prayers are always with you. May you always be successful and may your wishes come true. May you always be wise in making the choices in your life. Me and Baba will always be there for you and we always love you.

Post holiday

Actually, after a short work week and enjoying the long National Day break, it gets harder to get back to the work momentum. National Day was a good break. Managed to spent time with family and just getting fed with news of people that has lost touch for so long. Not that I am interested really, but need to put up the act that I am interested. Its things like this that I say which makes people come to the conclusion that I've changed. My attitude has changed. Not sure how much truth there is.. but had to admit that my level of sarcasm has increased. Which in simple words as some people wld put it...I've become very bitchy.
Does it mean that all along I've been very quiet abt things and mostly swallowing everything that is given that I'm OK. And now that I'm beginning to voice what is not right and what shouldn't be I've become "bitchy". Not very sure. But someone told me if by voicing out, things can change then its worth the talk. But if the culture has bn in placed and even by voicing out, I cannot change anything then I might as well just keep mum abt it. Need to really give it some serious thought. I remember telling someone that after years of being in the service and doing the same monotonous routine, you tend to become very good at giving no-brainer answers to a no-brainer questions. Does this also count to being bitchy?
But now after the long break, its really hard work. Prelims is now on. N levels then O levels. So as usual my duty days for exam is on. Nitty gritty issues like keys has become the highlight. Need to put up lots of 'drama'. But for how long... not very sure.
I was at the library yesterday. So I managed to hear some of the sermons by the motivators.
One very good point is on the value of PAIN. The higher the level of pain that we hv bn through in life, the more willing we are to work hard and to achieve our GOALS. The more we want to change our destiny.
"Failure is the Mother of Success". For me it like been there... done that.